Coffee is like a religion in Italy, and this guide on Italian coffee culture will be your new coffee bible.
I worked in a Caffè Gelato place run by Italians for 4 years as a teenager in Austria, and I will help you to demystify the world of Italian coffee.

Italians can be very judgmental about those who wrong their coffee culture, and lately, they like to bash on Americans online. But guess what, Italians see us central Europeans as coffee savages too.
That said, when in Italy, we try to follow all the coffee rules to the T, and I encourage you to do the same!
Take my hand, and I'll explain all the dos and don'ts for your upcoming Italy trip, and I can guarantee that you will never make a mistake again!
Espresso is the Norm
When you order a coffee in Italy, you will get an espresso. That's the absolute standard all over Italy.
The espresso is a strong shot of coffee, and it's served in a small espresso cup. It comes black, and some people add some sugar, others don't. Milk isn't added at all.
You can go ahead and say “un caffè” and Italians anywhere in Italy will serve you an espresso.
By the way, it's pronounced espresso and not eXpresso.
Stretched Out Black Coffee

If you want something like a filtered coffee, which you get at your diner back home, you will need to ask for a stretched black coffee. I have had this issue in Italy as well, because our black coffees in Austria are like the ones in the US.
Most places will either serve you a black espresso with extra water (as seen in the cover picture taken in Milan). This is also called a Caffè Americano, and usually the water is already added to the espresso in the cup. Tourist hotspots will have a Caffè Americano on the menu.
In northern Italy, being more like Austria and the former empire, you will be able to get a coffee known as Caffè Crema or a Verlängerter. It's a Vienna style stretched coffee, which in my opinion is the same thing as a Caffè Americano.
Drink at the Bar & Coperto

Italians down an espresso like a shot, while standing at the bar!
They come, they drink, and they leave, all within a minute or two while exchanging a few words with the staff or the owner.
Italians don't sit down because they are avoiding paying coperto. Coperto is a fixed table charge that you have to pay per person on top of your order.
You can't avoid paying coperto the moment you sit down in a coffee place, but you don't have to pay it if you stand at the bar. That's another reason why Italians prefer a quick espresso, as it cools faster and gives you an instant caffeine kick.
Keep in mind when drinking at the bar, to not linger all too long.
No Coffee to Go

Coffee to go is a general no-no in European coffee culture, and in Italy, it will earn you bad looks and a whole set of bad words.
You get coffee to go in Starbucks. But why would you go to Starbucks in Europe when you have come to experience the Italian and European culture?
Milk Coffee Drinking Times

Cappuccino, caffè latte, and latte macchiato are foamy milk coffees. If you ask for a latte in Italy, you'll get a glass of hot milk.
The cappuccino and caffè latte, which are served in a cup, contain more espresso compared to the latte macchiato. The Caffè Latte is larger than the Cappuccino.
The latte macchiato, on the other hand, is just hot milk with a tiny espresso shot poured into the foamy top, and it's served in a tall glass.
These are breakfast coffee drinks in Italy, and they are not served after 11ish am.
Guess what? Austrians and Germans like to break that rule too, which earns them nasty looks from the Italians.
Flavored Sweet Coffees

Syrup-flavored coffees are not a thing in Europe; I think that's a Starbucks phenomenon. You won't find that on the menu at Italian coffee places.
But you will find special coffees on the menu infused with liquor, such as rum, or liqueur, as in amaretto.
Sugar isn't added to your coffee. It's served along as an extra with your coffee, and you might get a small milk pot with that and a cookie. You can add each to your coffee as you please.
Glass of Water with Coffee

Serving a glass of fresh tap water with coffee isn't the norm in Italy. It's actually an Austrian thing that emerged in the Vienna coffeehouse scene.
That said, you will encounter coffee places in certain regions where they serve coffee with a glass of water automatically. I think that's great because free tap water is never a given in Europe!
It's somehow an old belief, and I can't tell you if it's true, that coffee is dehydrating, and therefore water is served with a cup of coffee. The same people also say that cold coffee makes you pretty.
We have encountered coffee served with water primarily in Northern Italy, basically the former Austrian territories: South Tyrol-Trentino, Lombardy (Milan), and Veneto (Venice).
Iced Coffee

I heard Americans and the rest of the world have been having another definition of iced coffee.
Whatever your iced coffee culture, the iced coffee in Italy might be different from what you are used to, and I'm just giving you a heads-up.
Variations exist across Italy, and most are made with left to cool black espresso. The espresso is collected and then poured into a glass with ice cubes.
Sometimes sugar is added, but not all that much, sometimes some milk. In the dolomite north, they like to add a few scoops of vanilla ice cream too.







I think you've got the macchiato around the wrong way... It's an espresso shot with a touch of milk/foam, not (mostly) milk with a touch of coffee.